My Horrible Dream About the Zack Snyder Batman Movie

My crude drawing of the costumes I saw in my dream...and yes that is Ben Afflek's inevitable chest hair.

My crude drawing of the costumes I saw in my dream…and yes that is Ben Afflek’s inevitable chest hair.

As a writer, one of my richest sources for material comes from my dreams, but I had a sort of odd nightmare last night that so disturbed me that I had to write about it in today’s blog.  It should produce a chuckle or two.

As you can see above, I have done the best I could (I am no Jerry Bennett) to illustrate the costumes that Mr. Snyder created for the caped crusader and his protege Robin.  In the dream, Ben Affleck played Batman, but his cowl covered the entire top of his torso with the eye holes stretching all the way down to just below his nipples (perhaps it was a faint memory of the awful Verhoven days).  For some reason, Robin wore a helmet that sported a lovely giant mohawk of a fin with two large protruding panels that served as giant ears.  His colors were also garish.

The strange yellow cube of liquid suspended above an abyss.  If you look close you can see my crude Batman and Robin figures struggling to survive.

The strange yellow cube of liquid suspended above an abyss. If you look close you can see my crude Batman and Robin figures struggling to survive.

In the dream I was shown a clip of the finished film, a scene in which Batman and Robin had to navigate a gigantic floating cube of liquid, upon the top of which was floating several metal platforms each connected with a chain.  As they progressed across the giant cube of liquid (which was remarkably colored to look like beer) they fell several times, finally falling away into the darkness of a chasm below.  I have done my best to illustrate the horror of the giant beer cube.

It was ghastly.

I was then given audience with Zack Snyder himself, and when I asked him why he had made such a horrible film he did not have any answers.  He only nodded and puffed on a cigarette.  I asked him details about the film, but it was telepathically understood that he would not divulge any information about the film because everything was indeed top secret and “hush hush”.

Not once was Superman mentioned or discussed.

I cannot explain this dream.  It simply is.  I am sure you all needed a laugh on Monday, and for that you are most highly welcome.

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